Processing challenging emotions: Sadness

Sadness can be a challenging emotion to process, because it demands a lot from the system. As a result a natural response to sadness is to avoid it, because we want it to disappear as quickly as possible.

Instead of avoiding or denying sadness, we need to learn to process it as an emotion. After all, like all the other emotions sadness is also a thermometer for our mental health, as it provides us with useful feedback regarding our mental wellbeing.

We can learn to process sadness in the following ways:

1. Recognise and acknowledge sadness as an emotion:

Locate it: How do you know that you are sad? For example is your mood low?are you feeling drained?

2. Normalise sadness as an emotion: It is okay to feel sad and it is okay to express sadness. It is also okay to name it and it is okay to cry when you are sad.

3. Identify sadness triggers: Where is it coming from?What you have experienced, seen or heard or what have you been thinking about? How have you been thinking about what you have experienced, seen or heard? Remember your thoughts and interpretations influence your emotions.

4. Rate the level: On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 indicating no sadness, 3 average and 5 being extremely sad, where would you rate your sadness?

5. Determine the frequency and impact: How often have you been feeling sad? and how has it affected your life?

6. Manage sadness: Depending on the level and frequency you can manage sadness by consistently accessing other emotions that will dilute or minimise it to a level that makes you comfortable. We access other emotions through positive interpretations, doing things that are nourishing and good for our souls and spending time talking with supportive and encouraging people.

If you have been feeling too sad and more often, with a negative impact on your functioning this may indicate a need to seek professional help.

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Dr Sibu Qhogwana

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